Is it really worth it to save and scrimp on everything just to marry someone on that one day which isnt even meant to please you?

I'll say it is. If you get to dictate what happens on that day, who to invite, who to see, what to wear, what to do, where to go, who to have, what to eat. Coz if left to me, I want an Arabian Night theme. With a gold wedding gown. And a traditional cantonese kua. Brought in from HongKong. So!

But evidently, that night only begins a life of struggle to live with someone you want to impress. Its precisely coz of the need to impress that makes the living together difficult. When you're dating, you have your own privacy to think things through alone, the opportunity to miss and look forward to the next date, the chance to recall all the memories you share. All these are gone the moment you live together coz you get to see him/her everyday now. The mysterious element is taken out now.

You no longer need to wonder what he is up to when he doesnt reply your smses. Coz you will hear his fart all the way from the kitchen as he is grabbing a beer from the fridge. He need not worry you will run away. Coz you are wearing the ring which tells the world you're his for life. Yes, even if the diamond is just as big as your pi-sai, it counts.

You smell each other's sweat, he throws his clothes all over the room, you take over the whole closet with your clothes, he gets control of the TV remote, you get hold of his unlimited credit card, he messes around with his golf clubs most of the time, you tinkle around in your jewellry all the time, he comes to you in the middle of the night, you drool into his pillow and stuff it in his face every night, he burps and fart at every opportunity he has (dat means every breakfast, recess, lunch, tea break, dinner, supper), you preen in the room for hours when he asks "Dine out tonight, Honey?" and you end up at the kopitiam opposite your block eating a plate of char kway teow. And when you give him the "you-are-so-dead" face with your carefully applied make-up and 3 inch heels, he will look at you innocently and say, "But baby! Isnt this more worth it than some $80 dinner which you are not even full??"

Ah.....Marriage. These marriages we witness in your parents everyday of our lives. Those days when there are no such things as shot-gun marriages, high rates of divorce and single-parenting. And I dont believe in shotgun marriages coz I have only witness one too many failed ones built on an unplanned child. I wont get a divorce coz once he marries me, he better take up that responsibilty for life. I will only stick to single-parenting if I dont feel secure enough to start a family when the one I'm with.

I wont compare my diamonds with my friends. Coz I earned them on my own credit. I wont compete with others to achieve a 5figure salary, a District 6 address with a big-ass car. Coz if I ever do get them, I get them on my terms.

At the end of the day, I just need that security to sign my name on a piece of paper, commiting me to him for a lifetime. I thought after all that I had, I gave up any hopes on that. But now that I have him who I can't let go off, I want to hold onto him. I just want to be with him. But I dont see why we always have misunderstandings.