Romance. Blown out of proportion. Yet not losing the true essence of it. Curiously enough though, its an issue the world has been suppressing for centuries. Wonder which brave soul broke all conventions & pursue it first. It doesn't exist here still. Not the form I want anyway. The romance practised here is monotone, easily obtained.

Was enjoying a chat with John & he mentioned the number of lovers we would allow our future partners. HE! The one who pussy-hop almost every week! Too bad he was raised in an open environment I can hear my mom say. It's a godsend she doesn't know about this evil presence. Otherwise I can forget about living.

He's by far the only person who has admired me for the knots under my belt. But he's one in a million! How many have judged me based on how many guys I've bedded. The male spieces I've encountered took it as a sign that I'll spread my legs for anything in pants. Of course, not to say its hard to deter them, after all I simply have to flash my uglist photo and they'll run-a-mile/need to go/busy(all of a sudden) and (the best I've come across as yet) developed a severe migraine.

John believes there's such a thing as painless love. He obviously hasnt been a proper relationship. Typically of guy, he believes sex comes with love too. Males. Sex=Love. What crap. With people like Jon Duan, the male spieces will never learn to respect physical contact properly. But then, come to think of it, like what the Oompus-Loompus said, every child's values is picked from elders. Our society shaped us.

Asian society will never accept me, so the guys will never accept me. I'm the kind of girl to hang out with, not the type whom a guy brings home(except its for the bedroom affair-& how typical of asian guys to restrict it to only the bedroom). Of course, should my family learn about it, I can jolly well forget about going home. It'll damage their social standing. Their face.

So now you understand why even Romance is all the same. coz Everybody has to have face. Naturally their idea of romance models after idolised movie scenes. Its crap. Unimaginative lot we have here. & I can't and wont have the romance I want. So I'm pulling out before anything gets too deep like thorns pricking. Stem the blood flow before its too late.

I can aspire to being a mistress thoguh. The part whereby I live a comfortable life. It comes with a price of course. No recongnition. Whatever for a life.